The laundry is done, kitty is in the kitchen beating the living shit out of a paper bag, the dog is passed out on the couch, my sister is on vacation in Canada and my aunt hasn't called me once tonight. All is well in my little world.

I realized today just how much I miss New York. Well, not New York but some of the people who inhabit it. I was on my way to work and heard a song that me and my co-workers used to play all the time and I got a little choked up. When I arrived at my office at It's Still Dark Outside o'clock, I looked at airfares online to see if I couldn't swing a trip to NYC for the weekend. Then I remembered that I have to stop by my sister's house once a day to feed her cat while she's away, so the trip is off for now & that made me sad. Then I realized that it's Halloween weekend and even as a kid, I didn't really care for this particular holiday & NYC is a fiasco on Halloween and I didn't feel sad anymore.

Speaking of Halloween, can someone tell me where October went? It was here a minute ago and I have a feeling I'm going to fall asleep & when I wake up it's going to be Thanksgiving. This time of year sort of fucks me up because it's the calm before the storm. Before ya know it, it's going to be all about going to 3 different dinners on Thanksgiving as to avoid offending anyone (I'm locked in to two so far) and tree trimming parties and all that holiday hoopla, all the while trying to pretend like I enjoy the holiday season. I'm always unusually happy on New Year's Eve because not only is it a fun night but I'm so thankful that I lasted through another 2 months of bullshit and nonsense. The one thing that I look forward to around Christmas is seeing who within my circle of friends will end up quoting what my mother once said on a particularly tense Christmas morning to my father - "Merry Fucking Christmas", a quote that has stood the test of time for over 25 years. I can't remember what the scenario was exactly, but I recall it had something to do with my mom asking my dad to help her with Something Very Important before the relatives arrived and my dad being too A) drunk and B) busy playing with my new Atari 2600 to be bothered with my mom's request.

I'm sorry, what was I saying? Oh yeah, I miss New York. Don't get me wrong, I like it here but there are things about NYC that I miss. For example:

1. being able to see movies when they're released ( I think they're currently showing American Beauty at the local theater.)

2. walking from my house to my destination if I feel like it

3. Pizza. I can't stress this enough.

4. cursing aloud and not have people look at me like I just slept with their grandmother

5. the luxury of being able to shop for shoes at more than one store, which, by the way, would be open on a Sunday

6. being able to throw my garbage away - I have to pay for trash pick up where I live, so I have to drive my garbage to my sister's once a week and throw it in the dumpster all McGuyver style (Thank good Christ I keep a bottle of Febreeze in my trunk.)

7. a decent pedicure (I got one recently and apparently I must've said something to the pedicurist about wanting to climb trees while barefoot.)

8. Not having the electricity go out when the wind blows in a weird direction.

9. Did I mention pizza?

10. People having the courtesy of calling before they show up at my house. I don't think I'll ever get used to people just walking into my house, like out of the blue because they were "in the neighborhood." And as some of you know, I don't live in a "neighborhood", so I'm not sure what they mean when they say that.

There are things I don't miss about NYC, as well:

1. I'm forbidden to smoke in a bar.

2. overly packed subways, especially when I'm on my way home from work because fate always fucks with you and makes you stand really close to someone that you sort of know from work, however you don't remember his/her name & you have to engage in small talk for 30 minutes

3. paying a million dollars for cigarettes

4. Blackouts. Either kind.

5. spending 80% of your monthly salary on rent

6. interviewing for a job knowing that 481 other people are gunning for the same stupid job

7. Bloomberg.

8. pitting out while waiting on the subway platform on horrendously hot days

9. not being able to play music loudly because I'll piss off a neighbor/roommate

10. dodging women that I've slept with & never called or having to forget ever going back to the bar where I met them because I'm convinced she'll be there

When I sat down to type this entry, I'm sure I had a point. Now it escapes me. Mea culpa.

xo,

Swan

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